It’s only uphill from here

PPD is no joke, especially when you’ve dealt with depression all your life. Thought I had a pretty good handle on things. I was wrong. This has been a whole new level that I’ve never experienced before.

Thankfully, I do know when to get help. I have a lot of supporting friends and family who have held my hand through this.

My doctor pretty much flat out told me to stop breastfeeding. So the past few days we’ve been quickly weaning Remy. He now takes a bottle. It’s mixed formula and breast milk, but starting tonight, I will be pumping and dumping.

It’s been heartbreaking for me. Harder on me than I think for Remy. I cried last night after I breast fed him one last time.

All I know now, though, is I’m ready to feel better. I’m ready to have a little drive back. I’m ready to soar. And from where I am, it can only get better.

I’m not alone in this either. First and foremost, I have God by my side. It would be impossible without Him. Then, I have my support system of loved ones.

All in all, I’m ready. Bring it.

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